One of the things that I’m obsessed with, is gentle birth. So I waited as long as I could with this pregnancy. 41 weeks to be exact. Here I was, thinking… Is the baby coming out at all? Is everything ok in there? I even had that feeling of “maybe baby wants to come out but he can’t!”
All the while, I started walking at the park again, climbed up and down the stairs—basically making myself busy with natural inducers. On the 41 week checkup, I settled some work stuff before going for the appointment. I felt pretty defeated at that point.
So during the check up, again, doctor found my baby’s heartbeat slow. I was wheeled into the labor room and strapped to the ctg. Doc mentioned “c-sec” which gave me a mini stroke. But again, the baby was fine according to the ctg. Doc gave me a recommendation to induce that night for the safety of myself & my baby. Otherwise, I can choose to wait ONLY another 3 days at my own risk.
OK let me tell you, I was very tempted to wait another 3 days but was the anxiety & my baby’s safety worth it? I’ve waited 10 months and one week! And the doctor gave me a stern recommendation which I didn’t take lightly.
So I went home, called hubs, spoke to my parents then prayed. To tell you the truth, I cried a bit. Then I bucked up and called the hospital to set the appointment for inducement. At this point, you can pretty much throw your birth plan out the window.
After putting Naila to sleep and kissing her goodnight, hubs sent me to the hospital around 10pm. After registration, we were brought to the room and I was hooked on ctg for I don’t know how long. They administered Prostin at around 12am. When I say ‘administer’ means they shoved the pill up my hooha ok. Not before the first of many vaginal examinations aka VE.
The whole experience up to this point is pretty bizarre to me. I was prodded, strapped to ctg and not allowed to move. Which is unlike my first labor. But then again, this is the standard procedure for being induced. Because Prostin or even pitocin drip could cause baby distress.
After an hour, I started feeling mild contractions. I tried to sleep because I knew that I was ganna need the energy later.. my 1st labor was very long, even up to the pushing stage. So I thought, maybe this one is the same?
I think I only slept for an hour because the contractions got stronger. I started walking around the room to ease the pain.. I also did squats because ya know, they can progress labor faster.
It’s funny.. time is infinity when you’re in labor. Because you’re just focusing on the contraction pain. I was walking and doing squats for about 2 hours come to think of it. The nurse came in at 6am to do ctg. Then did VE while I’m strapped to the CTG on top of handling strong contractions. Nurses, you’ve got no emotions!
Apparently I was 3cms already yay. The nurse told me to have my breakfast and freshen up. I’m entering the labor room at 8.30am for the pitocin drip and baby’s big debut! I wasn’t that hungry but forced myself to eat anyway. I took lots of dates. I woke hubs up *rolls eyes* He slept through the whole night because I was so quiet. *ROlls eyes*
Around 7am I was given an enema so you can quickly do the no. 2.
Shortly after that, the contractions pick up speed. The ctg was strapped again. The nurse could see that I was having stronger longer contractions and they got excited. When they’re excited, they do more VE. At that point I was like, go ahead!
This is where the trouble started. My baby’s heartbeat started dropping whenever I had a contraction. The nurses started scurrying around. Thing is, they never tell you anything, so I had to pull one aside and said “what’s going on?”
She said, “your baby’s heartbeat ‘tak cantik’.”
From their conversations, I knew my gynae has been informed and she’s on the way. They also mentioned c-section. I was praying and praying that my baby holds on & that my body cuts the crap and get to the pushing part already!
It all went very fast. I was 5cm when they wheeled me into the labor room. My contractions were painful and long. I was doing all this hypno visualizations of a flower blooming while taking deep breaths. But it’s really hard when the nurse keep telling me to sit still and not move.
“We need to see your baby’s heartbeat on the ctg!”
Woah the pain triples.
In the middle of that, the nurse hooked me to saline. It felt like too many things were happening at once.
Not long after that, I felt the urge to push. My water broke and I felt the gush.
The nurses started saying “serrum” to each other.
I alternate from panicking for my baby to taking deep breaths during contractions. It was 8.15am when I had the huge urge to push.
Remarkably, the nurses wanted me to breathe through the urge. “DON’T PUSH” was the instruction. Honestly I didn’t push but my freaking uterus was squeezing out the baby whether I wanted it or not.
It was very confusing at this point. The pushing urge were super intense.. every breathing technique forgotten.. the nurses didn’t want me to push but my baby’s heartbeat was dropping. They told me to lie sideways (oh NOW YOU WANT ME TO LIE SIDEWAYS), close my thighs and breathe air out with every urge to push.
IT WAS IMPOSSIBLE. THE WORST FEELING IN MY LIFE. It’s like fighting FATE.
My hands were numb and shivering. I was hyperventilating.
At one of those urges, I felt the top of baby’s head! Still I wasn’t allowed to push.
The clock showed 8.23am. The longest 10 minutes of my life. After what felt like an eternity of torture, my gynae appeared, spread my legs and said, “when you feel the urge, push as hard as you can”.
Well no need the invitation. The baby just slipped out the moment she finished that sentence.
I heard my baby’s strangled cry. It was 8.25am. Alhamdulillah the hard part is over!
The placenta birth was straightforward, I didn’t even feel it. I still felt strong cramps and I was like, “my stomach hurts!” So the nurse handed me the laughing gas.. I inhaled so much, I was drugged good. Funny--laughing gas doesn’t make the pain go away, it just muddles your brain that you don’t know what you’re feeling anymore.
So in the end, the prostin meds were all that it took to induce my labor.. I was overdue anyway. It’s very different from a natural birth, in terms of everything. But I knew what was gonna happen and there was a high chance that my baby would get distressed and the panicking and the super fast birth. But I’m glad things turn out the way it did.
I didn’t take any epidural, and there’s no episiotomy. After the birth, I had an overwhelming feeling of tiredness & bewilderment. Things felt out of control and I just listened to the nurses and submitted. Because that’s what induction is.
The main difference between having a natural birth & an induced one is—level of control. And the feeling afterwards. With the natural birth, I remember feeling an energetic high. I had been in labor over 7 hours but I felt fresh and like I just won the first place in a marathon.
Contrary to being induced.
It was overwhelming, it was fast and furious. BUT. It definitely did the job. My stance has always been natural birth unless there’s danger to me or the baby.
So.. verdict on which is more painful? Natural birth or induce?
Hm. I would say induce pain is harder to manage, just because you’re constricted to the bed and that the pain gets strong very fast. But it’s still very very doable. It helps to google success stories and to read about mothers who birth 4 kids without pain medications and their comment? “It’s no big deal & it’s not weird, it’s just natural.”
There’s MANY reasons why you shouldn’t take epidurals.. you’ll be better off physically and spiritually. Recovery is faster. Your baby doesn’t get drugged. Many many more reasons.
In conclusion, alhamdulillah my labor was straightforward & my baby came out healthy. Although I didn’t plan on getting induced, it’s in the best interest of myself & my baby. I’m also proud that I didn’t take epidurals both times. It’s all in the state of mind.
Okay over & out! Mommy wants to take a shower! If you’re interested to read about my first natural ‘gentle’ birth, go here –> LABOR STORY
Say ASSALAMUALAIKUM to baby TAWFIQ IBRAHIM
Born on 26th July 2016, 8.25am